If you have seen my Instagram you will know my favourite poem ever is ‘Welcome to Holland’ and I have always wanted to have a go at writing one about Violet..
Being pregnant was just amazing,
feeling you grow, kick and move was sublime.
Watching other mums have their babies
and their lives seemed so perfect all the time.
I was scared when you were on your way.
More so because it wasn’t how I planned
but I felt like I could conquer the world,
knowing soon I would be holding your hand.
You were perfect in every single way.
The happiness beamed over my face.
Finally meeting you properly
and holding you close in an embrace.
When they told me the news I broke down,
My whole world was shaken about.
Looking down at my little baby,
They must of got it wrong without a doubt.
Crying was all that I could do
and thinking this must be a curse.
This new little life we had created
was unwell, then I was thinking the worst.
Staring as you lay in your cot
As you lay so soundly one night
I apologised over and over
for it was my fault, and it just wasn’t right.
Your hand used to reach out to my chest
as you fed from me in the early morn.
And I know you could feel my heartbeat,
could you feel that it was torn?
You lay on that table so softly
and I didn’t want them to take you away.
He not only wheeled away my baby,
he had my whole world in theatre that day.
I wanted you back in my tummy
where we weren’t in this unfair world anymore.
I’d let you down completely
and for that I wont forgive myself, i’m sure.
I look at you now and i’m proud.
Proud of everything you’ve done in your years.
You’ve taught me to live life completely
and always overcome all your fears.
People say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
and now I completely understand it, I do.
Those were the scariest days of our lives
yet they were the best because I met you.